Dating these days are all about putting your eggs into multiple baskets. It's about compartmentalizing, to not get too invested into one person and to put your feelings on safety. Dating apps, Instagram, our millennial "philosophy" these days are to keep our options open and that the grass can always be greener.
Is that how you want to live though? Do you want to be dating and having sex with up to three different people at a time? Do you want to be a part of a process that is really similar to the "Bachelor" tv show, where you're competing with other women for the same guy.. and then he gets to pick who number 1 is or vice versa for you.. your own personal "Bachelorette" episode starring you.
Maybe I'm old fashioned. But I don't want to be competing with other women for the same guy. I don't want to be someone's "Number 1" girl. I want to be the only girl. I also want to feel all the emotions, the highs, the lows, the passion for somebody instead of having to bury one's feelings for someone. Go all in, and if it doesn't work out? Onto the next one. I honestly think that relationships are more stable and successful for the long run, if there's a good foundation from the beginning. That good foundation including honesty, true intentions, and the willingness to be open and vulnerable.
It's hard to remove myself from the situation when emotions are involved. So I use this perspective, would this guy be a good father? For example, if I had a young daughter, would this man be someone who won't fuck up my baby daughter's future ideals on love? Can he teach her that she's loved and valuable? If the answer is no, why waste your time on someone who can't even treat a young girl right? But when you use that perspective, of hmmm can this guy treat a little girl / my daughter right? That's when things dawn on you and a lightbulb goes off.
What are your thoughts on modern dating?